Baby Original offers free advice for expecting parents and supporting family and friends. Main topical sections include pediatrician care, parenting, grandparenting, motherhood fitness and health, and social issues including pets, siblings, and schooling.
Pregnancy to Newborm
From moments of considering to have a baby to the first moments of life your little angel plays their part. Their little red face is all scrunched up, and the sounds that voice from her puckered little mouth are the most precious notes you could ever hope for. You ache any time the nurses take her for tests, and you deny offers from well meaning friends and family who offer to hold her while you get some sleep. All you want to do is be with your new baby, and you’ll forego food, water and sleep to do just that!
Parenting to Grandparenting
Parenting is often a thankless job. It is a difficult job, and a job that keeps parents up at night. From crying babies to whining toddlers, defiant teenagers to aloof young adults, parents constantly struggle to understand and positively affect the lives entrusted them. But in the end, it is a job every parent will say is the most amazing and wonderful adventure imaginable. It is the smiles, first steps, first homeruns, family trips, hugs and kisses that outshine the less appealing aspects of parenthood, and it is for these moments parents gladly lump the rest.
Day Care and Schooling
For many, it starts with the first day of kindergarten. For others, it begins a year or two earlier, with preschool. For all, it is a momentous occasion that marks the beginning of a learner’s journey that will never end. It's late summer, and it school is about to begin!
Eager little kids follow anxious parents through stores, buying back-to-school clothes, backpacks and sneakers. They get fresh haircuts, take extra bubbly baths the night before and are sent to bed extra early to ensure a good night's sleep. The next morning they're off to school. Be it kindergarten, middle school or college, the routine is mostly the same. May be by the time they’re in high school, the bubble bath is out of the question, and they can borrow the car and do their own shopping, and by college, parents can only wonder about that good night’s sleep, but these details are only minor. The first day of school is a blend of excitement, anxiety and curiosity for all students and parents as well.
You’ll probably feel a little awkward and clumsy the first few times you diaper and dress your baby, but with a little practice, you’ll be handling him with ease and confidence. Use a waist high table of some kind even for a tiny baby so you won’t have backaches. An old dresser with a pad on top will now, but modern changing tables have built-in safety straps to hold your baby when he is old enough to squirm and resist. If you use disposables, diapering is almost automatic: lay the baby on the diaper, fold the front half of the diaper up over the baby and fasten it with the convenient attached tapes. [Those tapes sometimes tear, instead of throwing a diaper away, mend it with masking tape.] To keep wetness from soaking into outer clothing, use disposables with elasticized legs and turn the plastic top of the diaper to the inside. A cloth diaper can be given a figure eight twist at the crotch for both double thickness and a tighter fit. Pin the back of the diaper over the front, slipping one or two fingers between the cloth and the baby’s skin to keep the pin from sticking the baby. Use a pincushion or bar of soap to hold diaper pins [do not use ordinary safety pins, and keep them out of the baby's reach] Never hold pins in your mouth. Whichever kind of diaper you use, lay an extra one over your baby boy to avoid being squirted while you change him.
The kinds of clothing you select for your baby will reflect your own taste and inclinations. Some parents are willing to spend the extra time necessary to iron natural-fiber, woven- fabric because they like the look of a dressed up baby; others opt for simple knit clothing that needs little care. Whichever kind of clothing you prefer, look for garments that will be easy for you to put on and take off the baby-those with few, if any buttons, necklines with large enough openings to fit easily over the baby’s head, and sturdy crotch fasteners that make diaper changing easier.
Most babies come home from the hospital with remnants of the umbilical cord still attached to the belly button, or the umbilicus. Until this falls off give your baby only sponge baths. Clean the navel area twice a day or so with a cotton swab dipped in antiseptic. Do this gently but thoroughly, making sure to get to the base of the cord stump. Watch for yellow matter, a sort of “weeping” that may develop, and for redness. These are signs of possible infection-notify your doctor if they persist. Keeping the top edges of the baby’s diaper folded down below the navel will help to keep the area dry. When the cord falls off, usually within ten days to two weeks after the baby’s birth, it is not unusual for a few drops of blood to be left on the navel. No bandage, binding, or tape is required. If the umbilicus doesn’t dry up in a few days after the cord comes off, an umbilical granuloma may be present. This is a little nubbin of tissue in the umbilicus at the junction of the old cord and the new skin. Your doctor can remedy the situation easily at the baby’s first checkup. If there is much bleeding or a foul odor coming from the cord, consult your doctor earlier for any special instructions needed.
For a sponge bath, you will need a warm, draft free room, a basin of lukewarm water, and two big towels-one to bathe the baby on, and the other to wrap him in after the bath. If your baby cries when totally undressed, give him a bath in stages, removing only part of the clothing at one time. Many babies love the feeling of being totally naked, though and enjoy waving their arms and legs about freely. You don’t really need soap for a newborn, some parents don’t use it for several months. If you can’t bring yourself from skipping it altogether, use very little because soap will dry up your baby’s delicate skin. Ordinary scented soap may trigger an allergic reaction, and it will disguise the wonderful “baby smell” that lets everyone in the house know that an infant is present.
Infants do not need to be bathed every day. The diaper area is of course, cleaned frequently, and two or three full baths a week are sufficient.
It’s almost certain that every parent trying to find a good day care situation has thought of the sexual abuse that has been reported in the media. How do you know that you are leaving your child in a safe place and what are the different options?
Breastfeeding can be a problem of convenience, though for some working women who are adaptable and willing to experiment, it is possible to have the best of both worlds-working and nursing. Your success will depend on your working conditions, your day care arrangements, your milk supply, and other factors. The tiniest of babies can be incredibly flexible, and you may be able to nurse the baby in the evenings and on the weekends when you are at home and have your caregiver feed the baby bottles of formula or your expressed breast milk. Your breast milk can be safely stored by refrigerating it for up to twenty-four hours or freezing it for two weeks. An occasional woman is lucky enough to find as a caregiver a nursing mother who will feed her infant charge as well as her own baby.
First, consider your child’s needs. Some centers may expect your child to play quietly all day, others may provide a pre-school atmosphere with structured activities. Consider how many children will be there during the day, large groups may not work well for a shy, easily “lost” child. The point here is that the “ideal” daycare situation will be different for each child. One one-year old may be ready for a structured pre-school type day care center, while another may be much happier staying with a neighbor.
Consider your needs. What hours will you need care, and what location will be the most convenient? And don’t forget to consider how much you can afford.
The most difficult problem is leaving a baby only a few weeks old is that of finding adequate care for him of her while you are gone. Most new mothers who return to work leave their babies with trusted and competent relatives. If you do not have family members who can provide this care, you my have trouble finding a sitter or day care center that will accept responsibility for such a young baby, and charges will probably be higher than they would for an older baby.
Learn to save your strength as you care for your twins [or any baby] by lifting them as seldom as possible, and when you do lift them, by using the muscles in your legs instead of those in your back. When they can crawl or walk, save steps by letting them come to you for playing and loving as you sit on the floor. Childproof your home very carefully, two inquisitive little people will find more than twice as many things to get into as one.
It’s wise to prepare yourself for strong jealousy of your twins among other children, both older and younger. Twins receive a great deal of admiration and attention from outsiders, they take more of their parent’s time, and they are so often so devoted to each other that they shun other children. On the other hand, many twins wish they were singletons. They tire of always having to contend with a sibling of the same age who receives the s me treatment.
That is one reason you will continue to treat your twins as individuals. Provide two birthday cakes. Don’t always dress them alike. Encourage them to have different interests. Don’t use nicknames that marks them as twins ["Pete and Repeat" for example] and try to discourage others from doing so.
Make a point of not worrying about your twins’ development in comparison with other children their age. If they were born prematurely, think of them in terms of their gestational age-their expected birth date-rather than their chronological age. They may be so content with each other’s company that they aren’t in a hurry to move from one stage to another. Twins often develop their own special language, which only they can speak and understand; discourage this by speaking to one twin at a time and waiting for him or her to answer.
Your doctor may know if your community is served by a branch of the Mother of Twins Club Inc. If there is not one near you, or if you would like more information, write the national club at 12404 Princess Jeanne NE, Albuquerque NM 87112. Joining this group while you are pregnant may be the best thing you can do for yourself and your babies. After coming home from the hospital, you’ll receive the moral support of others in your situation and possibly some physical support as well. Club meetings offer speakers, workshops, and clothing and equipment exchanges, as well as social benefits. The national group publishes a quarterly newsletter and other helpful and informative literature.
The Center for the Study of Multiple Birth [333 E. Superior Street, Suite 476, Chicago Il. 60611] provides information for parents, serves as a clearinghouse for information on twin research, and operates a bookstore. If you live in Canada, you can obtain information about twins by writing to Parents of Multiple Births Association of Canada, 283 7th Avenue South, Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada T1J 1H6.
You’ll probably feel a little awkward and clumsy the first few times you diaper and dress your baby, but with a little practice, you’ll be handling him with ease and confidence. Use a waist high table of some kind even for a tiny baby so you won’t have backaches. An old dresser with a pad on top will now, but modern changing tables have built-in safety straps to hold your baby when he is old enough to squirm and resist. If you use disposables, diapering is almost automatic: lay the baby on the diaper, fold the front half of the diaper up over the baby and fasten it with the convenient attached tapes. [Those tapes sometimes tear, instead of throwing a diaper away, mend it with masking tape.] To keep wetness from soaking into outer clothing, use disposables with elasticized legs and turn the plastic top of the diaper to the inside. A cloth diaper can be given a figure eight twist at the crotch for both double thickness and a tighter fit. Pin the back of the diaper over the front, slipping one or two fingers between the cloth and the baby’s skin to keep the pin from sticking the baby. Use a pincushion or bar of soap to hold diaper pins [do not use ordinary safety pins, and keep them out of the baby's reach] Never hold pins in your mouth. Whichever kind of diaper you use, lay an extra one over your baby boy to avoid being squirted while you change him.
Most babies come home from the hospital with remnants of the umbilical cord still attached to the belly button, or the umbilicus. Until this falls off give your baby only sponge baths. Clean the navel area twice a day or so with a cotton swab dipped in antiseptic. Do this gently but thoroughly, making sure to get to the base of the cord stump. Watch for yellow matter, a sort of “weeping” that may develop, and for redness. These are signs of possible infection-notify your doctor if they persist. Keeping the top edges of the baby’s diaper folded down below the navel will help to keep the area dry. When the cord falls off, usually within ten days to two weeks after the baby’s birth, it is not unusual for a few drops of blood to be left on the navel. No bandage, binding, or tape is required. If the umbilicus doesn’t dry up in a few days after the cord comes off, an umbilical granuloma may be present. This is a little nubbin of tissue in the umbilicus at the junction of the old cord and the new skin. Your doctor can remedy the situation easily at the baby’s first checkup. If there is much bleeding or a foul odor coming from the cord, consult your doctor earlier for any special instructions needed.
It’s almost certain that every parent trying to find a good day care situation has thought of the sexual abuse that has been reported in the media. How do you know that you are leaving your child in a safe place and what are the different options?
Learn to save your strength as you care for your twins [or any baby] by lifting them as seldom as possible, and when you do lift them, by using the muscles in your legs instead of those in your back. When they can crawl or walk, save steps by letting them come to you for playing and loving as you sit on the floor. Childproof your home very carefully, two inquisitive little people will find more than twice as many things to get into as one.
Your doctor may know if your community is served by a branch of the